You don't have power over me. I do.

So...here I am.  In the midst of what I fondly refer to as "Birthday Season".  Sewing my ass off.  Crafting my ass off.  Baking my ass off.  Really just putting my whole heart into my children.  So since I put so much *unnecessary* pressure on myself to do too much, I always feel slightly to exuberantly stressed out.  Also, my husband has been traveling more than normal, and an upcoming trip is throwing me off.  My mom talked to me the other day and passively aggressively told me how bi polar I am.  (May be true, but I try hard to contain it and be on top of what triggers me and when to dial things down....also mostly I just get anxious.  No depression.  And PLEASE do not encourage me to go to a doctor.  They've only prescribed me meds that make everything WORSE, not better.  The best thing for me is to totally clean up my eating, get more exercise, and take things off of my stress list.) 

So I'm quite into instagram.  I love it.  It's like mini blogging, with TONS of pictures.  It's my happy place.  Usually....  I have had a few bad experiences. BUT, all of the bad has been brought on by my own issues.  Paranoia.  Lack of confidence.  Etc.  All I'm going to say is that NO ONE HAS THE POWER OVER HOW I FEEL ABOUT MYSELF.  Even if I did mess up.  That does not make me a bad person.  I will nick this confidence issue in the bud, before I'm 35 I hope!!  (Big changes take time...)  People you meet on the internet, although are real, flesh and blood, still are basically strangers.  You've not met them face to face.  You've not seen how they react when they're angry, or sad, or scared.  You mostly only know the perfect images they WANT you to believe is reality.  And I'd know.  I'm an internet lady.  Facebook.  Instagram.  Now a blog.  I will not let a moment of my own weakness result in me beating myself up all day.  It's over.  I said I was sorry.  (Wasn't even that big of a deal, but I don't enjoy being called passive aggressive when in all reality, it was presumption.  I presumed something to be true when I know nothing of the circumstances.  Done.)  I'm not a confrontational person.  So when I am confronted my stomach churns all fucking day long.  But not today.  I have power.  Over myself.  Over future mistakes.  Over the NOW!  I'm good enough.  I'm smart enough.  And doggonnit....people like me!  Even with my flaws.

Ok.  Rant over.  I empowered myself, which is what I needed.  Learned from my mistake.  Learned how to not handle it (learning from the way others react is a way I can not treat others poorly in a moment of heated reaction).  And now, for my past week!

Teagan's 3rd birthday party was Sunday.  It was pretty great.  Mermaids mermaids everywhere!  Here are a few pics.  I'll blog about the whole thing later, as I want to share some of the sources of my inspiration and creation!  I hope everyone had a great Valentine's day.  I celebrated Zoey's 5th birthday today.  Her REAL day of birth!  Her party is Saturday!

Good bye, small amount of readers.  And mostly friends.  Until next post...